This past Sunday I preached on Jesus’ Parable of the Two Lost Sons (or as it’s more commonly known, “The Parable of the Prodigal Son”). And as I studied and prepped for this message, I was struck again by just how powerful an emotion SHAME is and how negatively it can shape and influence our relationship with Jesus.
Think about the power and the voice shame can have in our lives:
- Shame tells us that we are screw-ups who are exempt from God’s grace.
- Shame tells us that God is disappointed in us (and angry with us) and that we have to work hard to earn his approval.
- Shame tells us that God’s love for us is conditional on our ability (or inability) to please him.
- Shame tells us that we aren’t worthy to be called children of God because of our past and current sin.
- Shame tells us that we aren’t good enough and that we need to prove ourselves, to God and to others.
- Shame can keep us from allowing God (and others) to bless and celebrate us, because we think we don’t deserve it.
- Shame can keep us from asking for help and from admitting our failures.
- Shame can make us feel hopeless and like we will never change.
- Shame can lead us to self-medicate and turn to sin & destructive behaviors to make ourselves feel better.
- Shame can lead us to compare ourselves to others, making us insecure and judgmental.
- Shame can make us angry and bitter, blaming others (and God) for our pain.
- Shame can lead us into fake & surface relationships where we hide our true selves from others.
- Shame tells us that our identity is found in what we have done, not in what Christ has done and who He says we are.
- Shame tells us that our sin is more powerful than the cross and that what Jesus accomplished for us is not enough.
- Ultimately, shame tells us that we weren’t worth Christ dying on the cross for and that the resurrection was pointless.
Now, think about the gospel and what Christ has accomplished for us:
- The Gospel says that there is no condemnation (shame) for those who are in Christ Jesus! (Romans 8:1-2)
- The Gospel says that NOTHING (i.e sin & shame) can ever separate us from the love of God! (Romans 8:38-39)
- The Gospel says that we can’t earn God’s grace and favour by being really good. Salvation & redemption is free! (Ephesians 2:4-10)
- The Gospel says that you have been bought with a high price and that you were worth dying for! (1 Corinthians 6:20, Romans 5:8)
- The Gospel says that in Christ we are more loved more than we could ever know, and that we can’t do anything to earn or un-earn his love! (John 3:16-17)
- The Gospel says we are able to love and experience real relationships with others because God first loved us! (1 John 4:19)
- The Gospel frees us to be who God created us to be! (Romans 6:18)
- The Gospel says that in Christ you have been (or can be) forgiven once and for all, and that guilt & shame can have no power in your life! (Colossians 2:13-15, Psalm 103:12)
So like the prodigal son and his older brother (Luke 15:11-32), we have a choice. SHAME or THE GOSPEL. Guilt or Grace. Condemnation or Love. Earning or Receiving. Which will you choose? I’m learning to live into this second list and to choose grace…
